An effective dating guide will give you advice on how to find a suitable soul mate on the internet even without having to meet them first. What this guide doesn’t tell you is how to deal with a breakup if it were ever to happen. Romantic breakups are a very common thing yet people tend to underrate the trauma it causes to the concerned peoples’ lives.
Since they happen all over, people tend to be more open about them which lead to sympathy from the other end. It could be possible for people to reduce the damage and hurt caused by a breakup to an individual.
The bad thing about romantic relationships is that they tend to stir intense emotions which tend to overpower logic. People tend to pour out their hearts to their lovers; divulging deep secrets and putting all their trust in someone else’s hands. When a breakup occurs, it makes the culprit feel like a part of their existence has been erased. It could lead to feelings of rejection which sometimes could be too strong leading to depression.
Self-care is one of the most important things after a breakup. People who have been heartbroken go through 4 stages of healing namely: denial, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Although it takes time, many people can heal eventually. Different people grief in a different way, but the following steps will help you on the healing journey.
Take some time off and let out
It is always advisable not to hold back any grief you may be going through. However, it could prove to be too intense for public display. It is for this reason that you are advised to take this time to go out and just focus on yourself. Find somewhere private and sob it out. If you want, go ahead and yell it out or scream it out. This is a great way of relieving yourself of the heaviness you might be feeling inside.
One of the effects of grieving is neglecting yourself. Some people tend to blame themselves for the breakups while others tend to make themselves the victims. These feelings of guilt may make one punish oneself either knowingly or unknowingly. What you should focus on at this trying moment is taking care of yourself. Go out, get that massage you have been postponing, get a facial. It will leave you feeling more relaxed, and you will realize your worth and better yourself. If you had neglected some good practices like exercise, go ahead and hit the gym. Eat well and treat yourself well because you deserve it.
Listen to sad music
Although this might seem like the opposite of what you should be doing, it is actually helpful. Listening to sad music helps normalize the grief by letting you know that you are not the only one going through a tough time.
Talk to supportive people
Talking to family friends and friends could prove to be effective but if you need professional help, then go to a therapist. The advantage of paying for a therapist’s service is that they offer a neutral, long lasting perspective to whatever you are going through. A therapist will also help you understand deeper behavior patterns and the symptoms of a doomed relationship making sure that your future relationships are much healthier and happier.
Participate in meaningful work
Go ahead and help someone who might be needier than you. You can decide to volunteer at an orphanage or a retirement home. This will open your eyes to see how lucky and fortunate you are. The service will fill your heart with gratitude and love giving you a new perspective.
Do not allow yourself to get into an on-off relationship with your Ex. You might have some unresolved or unanswered questions, but the best thing is to limit contact with him/her. Keeping in tabs with your Ex could bring more heartache than when you try to heal away from them. Set strict boundaries and stick to them and soon you will be yourself once again.
Get back on your feet again
Having followed the previous steps, you will most likely be in a better shape emotionally, physically and, mentally. This step is to help you take back control of your life with a vision of greater things coming your way.
Meet new people
Although rebounding could prove to be risky when you feel ready to taste the dating waters, go ahead and meet some new people. People usually take 3-6 months to feel ready to start dating again finally. It is the fastest way to restore your feelings, just remember to take it slow; after all, you don’t want to experience another breakup.
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